I came across the tomb of Lionel Lockyer in Southwark Cathedral last weekend.

He invented a cure-all pill, which, it appears was basically antimony. I’m indebted to an article, by Dr David Haycroft, for letting me know that the pills were called Pilula, Radiis solis extracta — pills extracted from the rays of the Sun! Lokyer printed 200,000 pamphlets proclaiming the wonders of his PILLS, and made himself a tidy fortune. In 1665 William Johnson, chemist to the College of Physicians, took Lockyer to task, pointing out the pills were a 64 times markup on the basic ingredients.

Death did not slow him down. Wanting to carry on the family business, his memorial reads as an adverting billboard. I’m sure his children were pleased that the old boy was thinking of them as they carried on the very lucrative Family business. Living proof of the power of advertising – even in the afterlife.

Anyway, here is the verse:

Here Lockyer lies interred enough; his name
Speakes one hath few competitors in fame:
A Name soe Great soe Generally may scorne
Inscriptions which doe vulgar tombs adorne:
A diminutioon tis to write in verse
His eulogies, which most men’s mouths rehearse.
His virtues & his PILLS are soe well known,
That envy can’t confine them under stone.
But they’ll survive his dust and not expire
Till all things else at th’universal fire.
This verse is lost, his PILL Embalmes him safe
To future times without an Epitaph: